My mother always said that one day I will share my story, the story of the day God brought me through to Glory.
She told me that I will one day share my life stories, dictating what I’ve been through and experienced throughout my young, fragile and naive life. The good days the bad days and especially the stories of the days that broke me.
The stories of the days that made me cry, the days that made me want to give up and questioned why, why Me God why, and just kept on asking why. The stories of the days that I would just want to close my eyes; to give up and never to see the light at the end of the Glory.
My mother always told me that one day I will share my story, she would say;
‘‘I believe in you my dear and God does too. God loves you and only want the best for you, so don’t blame him for what you’re going through, just pray and thank him and God will surely see you through’’.
I remember she would take my hands and say in her thick Nigerian accent “my daughter, don’t you give up now because this is all just part of Gods plan, but the enemy will try to stop you from getting up and living your dreams, but don’t let this be, continue to fight, when you’re down get up and pray and keep praying until you can finally see the great woman you can truly be”.
She would pray for me and tell me not to worry and remind me of the fact that God is real and he will see me through. She said ‘‘Let this situation be your beginning, the beginning of the best part of your life my dear, learn from the past and don’t you fear. Have faith and cast away any doubt or fear and make the changes that you no longer want to bare.
Never let anyone put you down, remove your crown, or stop you from starting the best thing that is ever to appear. The Glory of God is in you and that you should hold so near’’. “One day” she said “you will think back on those days and smile, you mark my words, in fact, you write it down.
If only you could see in you what I can truly see, of the great things God has in store for you my dear and what he knows you can truly achieve. Just keep on praying and give God all the praise he will bring you out of any situation so don’t you fear “.
In doubt I would look to the ground and sadly utter the words and say, “I don’t think God hears me when I pray, I’m not cut out for all of this, so let me just give up today. I can’t seem to make it and however hard I try; I know people will never think I’m good enough so why should I continue in vain. Mum, I love what I do and hope someday the world will see and love it too.
I dream I really do, that one day my dreams will come true, I hope that one day a Blessing will surly come my way and the whole world will know my name and the Glorious Gift God has brought my way. I love to use my hands to create and to illustrate what I dream and see inside my head.
But sometimes I just get so frustrated, tired and weak, I have so much going on in my mind that I dread to think of what is yet to be said, when people congregate to diminish my name, they diminish my dreams and myself believe of the things that I truly want to be.
What’s the point of all; the heartache and pain, the constant shame to remain in the same place as five years ago today. No achievement no relevance no progress in what I want to be in my life, just the same old me that nobody sees’’.
Angrily she would say, ‘‘my daughter stop being so negative, it breaks my heart when you put yourself down like this. Don’t worry yourself about other people’s negatives, the opinions of others are not worthy because it due to their jealousy. To be a topic of discussion just means that you are relevant, that’s why they will always find something negative to say. Yes, I know that you are hurt and your spirit has been put down, you will take some time just to heal but don’t worry God won’t let you down.
Don’t you ever let anyone even me your mother tell you that you are no good, remember that practice makes perfect, so keep doing what you do, and with that one day you will master it and perfect what you do. A small seed that has not yet been planted will not suddenly start to grow but it will need to take its place firmly in the earth, be nurtured and watered then slowly it will grow. Starting from just a little seed, then growing into a beautiful blossoming plant or a tree. In the same way you will prosper. Never you let anyone uproot you or plant the seed of doubt in you, just keep on growing and one day you will surely increase and be as high as you want to grow.
Forget about those who left you and the foolish ones that rejected you,
just remember Psalms 118:22 tells us that ‘the stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone; This is the Lord’s work. We consider it amazing. This is the day the Lord has brought about. We will be happy and rejoice in it’. Don’t focus on the negativity and God will take you where you want to be, just do your best and leave the rest to God’’.
My mother always said that one day I will tell my life’s story.
Just don’t give up she says and know your worth and always give God all the Glory.